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If we do a phenomenal job at parenting, there's no discipline problem downstream.
Building a foundation of trust starts from the moment they are born.
Make an adjustment today and start seeing better results immediately.
If you're the 1 causing the problems, that means you're also the solution.
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You enjoy parenting and your kids enjoy being parented.
Hey there, this is Greg Denning.
We want to reach as many people as possible and help as many families as possible with these conversations.
And we want to keep this podcast ad free forever.
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0:47
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Extraordinary Family Life Podcast.
We are your host, Greg and Rachel Denning.
What we are talking about today is the truth that effective parenting removes most of the discipline problems in the home or.
1:04
Parenting problems, right?
So being really good as a teacher and a mentor in your own home, parenting effectively.
Eliminates, prevents, removes almost all the need for discipline, all the behavior problems, all the the issues that come up, most of the things that parents are looking for answers for like how do I punish?
1:27
How do I discipline, How do I give time outs?
How do I do this?
They become a non issue when you become really effective at parenting and mentoring.
It is true.
Despite the fact for the majority of parents, that's a very painful reality to finally realize because I had to finally realize that my ineffectiveness as a parent was causing my parenting problems.
1:49
It was causing the problems with my children.
It was causing, causing or contributing to all the problems I was having with my kids came from my ineffective parenting.
If in my home I'm not effective and really good at teaching, coaching, connecting and touring, if I'm not running my home really well now what are my children going to start doing?
2:17
A man, they're bored.
They're.
Mischievous.
They're mischievous.
Yeah, they get irritated and frustrated, which causes.
A lot of it throwing tantrums.
They're talking, talking back.
In a, in a disrespectful way.
They're fighting with their siblings, they're fighting with us.
They're the little boys become destructos.
2:35
I mean, they're on and on and on.
So we can, we can go.
They're just.
Think of all start being dishonesting problems.
They start sneaking.
Yes, and like they're just looking for ways to entertain themselves.
Or if we're too controlling now they start looking for ways to rebel.
And the only reason they're looking for ways to rebel is because we're trying to control them.
2:53
No human being wants to be controlled.
So the comparison there, I believe is absolutely accurate and true.
But the painful part of that is that we are literally, as the parents, causing or contributing all the to all the problems we're finding in our home with our children.
3:11
Ouch.
How can you say that?
I know.
Rachel, it's it's difficult and it's painful to hear.
Here's.
What I want to do right now, I want, I want to say this so clearly, like if you're, if you're driving or riding your bike, whatever, it's like pull over and write this down, take some notes.
I want you to internalize this.
3:27
Parenting is a very specific skill like tennis.
So I suck at tennis.
I personally in real life, in real life, this is not hypothetical.
I really suck at tennis.
I could misinterpret that to be like, I'm not athletic, I'm not a good person. 40 yeah, I'm I'm a bad person.
3:48
And.
And so I go out on a tennis court and I hit a ball and it just goes flying into the road, hits a car.
So upset.
Like oh.
I'm such a failure.
So you come over and you say, Greg, you caused all those problems because you suck at tennis.
4:05
Like you hit that ball way over there.
A possible.
Problem at tennis, Yeah.
Like you're not, you're not good at tennis at that moment.
I could be like, I'm not a good person.
I'm terrible.
I'm a no, but this is horrible.
Or I could be like, I don't know how to use this racket yet to hit the ball the right way.
4:24
It's a very, very specific skill.
And I'm like, I'm, I'm going to go out every single day with my racket and this ball and I'm going to keep practicing until I can hit that ball right back.
Across that, but even more importantly, because in some ways, I think sometimes parents intuitively do that since we're, you know, using this as an analogy here, they will go and practice.
4:48
They go and they were like, I'm going to practice disciplining, I'm going to practice this, I'm going to practice that.
But the key here is you have to actually get a good coach, a good mentor, someone who knows how to play the game of tennis in this example, to show you how to practice the correct way so that you can actually get the outcomes and results that you want.
5:14
So now we take this back to parenting.
So this is.
Where I get fired?
Up I want to emphasize this for a minute so they get the message we're trying to share here.
Too many people believe that if you're a good person, that just automatically makes you a good parent and that parenting just comes naturally.
5:30
It's not true.
You can like you said.
Incredible human being, yeah.
And you can be great at a lot.
Terrible at tennis.
Exactly.
You can also be an incredible human being and just be terrible at parenting.
You just don't have the skills, just like you don't have tennis skills.
You just don't know how to use a racket.
5:47
So that's the framework we want parents to have to understand that if you're having problems in your home with your children, the reason why is because of the things you are doing or not doing.
Just like if you're having problems playing, playing tennis, it's because of things you're doing or not doing.
6:07
Like like it's a direct connection.
There's no other.
You can't blame the other player.
You can't blame the ball, you can't blame the racket you are making.
You're doing it.
You're the one playing the game, right?
So it comes back to you.
It is exactly the same with parenting.
6:22
I'm on the tennis court hitting the ball every which way but backward opponent side and I'm like, it's the government.
This, the IRS, this ball just has a mind of its own.
Like it.
It's just a rebellious ball, you know?
I need a different racket.
But that's what we do with our children because of the fact that, yes, we're actually dealing with another human being.
6:43
So there's, you know, there's a variable involved there.
Our children, not balls that we just hit wherever we want.
There is.
They are.
Not objects.
Exactly.
They're not objects.
They are not inanimate where you pick up a rock and you set it over there and the rock stays there exactly right.
6:59
And in fact, some ways, you know, if we want to continue expanding this analogy, this metaphor we started with, I think in some ways they become the other player.
There's someone we're learning to play the game with so that we can get the outcomes and results we want.
We want to play the game of tennis.
7:14
We want to hit it back and forth.
We want to have a fun time, but unless we learn to work with our children instead of controlling them, we're not going to be getting the outcomes we want.
We're going to be frustrated and overwhelmed and stressed, wondering why parenting is so hard.
7:31
And it's because we just haven't learned the skills of playing the game because parenting is a very specific skill you need to learn so.
I want to touch on something else real quickly before we dive into that.
There are so many and I'm thinking, and I'm not trying to be mean or, or rude or disparaging, but there are so many parenting experts and very, very famous, very well known and their entire platform are tactics and strategies for discipline and handling situations.
8:01
The last thing I want to do as a parent is become an an expert at disciplining because if I have to perfect my disciplining, I have a much bigger problem.
I've got to go upstream and, and change things so there's no discipline problems.
8:18
Like I, I want to emphasize this and, and try to articulate it clearly enough that listeners just, you get it.
Like if we do a phenomenal job at parenting, there's no discipline problem down the street.
And one of the best ways I've heard this explained came from The Anatomy of Peace, which is a book that focuses on helping this framework of helping things to go right.
8:42
They, they have a whole pyramid and most of the pyramid, 75% or more of the pyramid is focused on helping things to go right.
And the very top piece of the pyramid is fixing what's gone wrong.
That's what we're talking about, where the example you're just giving talks about how most parents spend their time trying to fix what's gone wrong.
9:02
I'm going to discipline, I'm going to punish, I'm going to ground, I'm going to put you in a timeout.
I'm going to all of these things.
Literally trying to be experts in that.
Yeah.
They're trying to be experts in the disciplining when we're like, no, no, no, yeah, have some strategies for that.
Get good at that.
But that should be where you spend the least amount of time because the rest of your time is spent helping things to go right so that those issues don't become a problem.
9:28
And it's true.
It's real.
Like, people might think we're like, this is a pipe dream, but it's not.
It's a reality.
We have real results, real results for 20 years.
And and not just us, we're not just the anomalies here, like we're the only ones in the world.
9:44
There's, you know, I don't even know how many of parent.
Yes, they're rare.
They're more rare.
It is more rare.
But the people we have learned from are the ones who have.
Well, and the people, we've taught that they go ahead.
And do the same with clients.
I heard coaching clients come back and like wow.
The like this actually works.
10:00
Wow.
We our family dynamics are cool.
Everything is completely transformed.
All the stuff we're struggling with is now no longer an issue.
At all.
And that's the point.
Become an absolute expert in helping things go right so there are no discipline problems.
10:17
Instead of seeking to become an expert in disciplining because there's so many problems, why not instead become so good at your true job as a parent?
Which we call parent mentoring essentially to differentiate it from just the idea of parenting in general.
10:34
But I want to emphasize though, because going back to this analogy with the tennis and, and the fact that some of the things we've said can make people feel bad because we're saying you're the problem, you're the 1 causing the problems that you don't want in your family relationships.
10:50
The other way of viewing this, you know, cuz again, you could take it as I'm a bad person, I'm no good, I'm failing, you know, I feel, I feel guilty, I feel shame.
But the other way of seeing it is viewing it as an opportunity and actually as like a wonderful thing, you know, because in reality, if you're the 1 causing the problems, guess what, that means you're also the solution.
11:14
Like that's a big deal.
That's a huge plus for you.
It doesn't mean you're just doomed to an unhappy family or rotten kids or because it's bad luck, you know, or because it's completely out of your control.
The good news is this is an opportunity.
11:31
It's an opportunity for you to actually take back control, Take back individual control or even better word is responsibility of saying I have power to create change in myself and in the way that I interact with my children so that I can get more of the outcomes I actually want.
11:54
Instead of unknowingly sabotaging our relationships by participating in these drama triangles and other all these other things that are going on that I'm, you know, I don't have awareness of that's causing the problems I don't want.
I can stop that.
I can change that.
I can be a force for good and for change.
12:12
And can create a total transformation in the family.
Yeah, so amazing.
We're talking about good people who are striving to be good parents and they genuinely want the best outcomes for the kids.
And they're they're intentionally taking actions to try to get those outcomes, but they're not getting the outcomes they want.
12:31
And they're wondering why.
What's happening?
Ineffective strategies or or ineffective skills or lack of skills.
I recently received a message from somebody I'd coached maybe a year or two ago.
Unbelievable transformation in their family because she had implemented the strategies I taught her into her marriage first.
12:54
Well, actually into herself first.
Like the very you work harder on yourself than you do anything else as #1 So let's say, hey, you got to work on you, then you got to work on your marriage and then together you guys work on on your family dynamics, your culture, all that stuff.
So when we're talking about these things, we're we're speaking from first hand experience because we started out as normal parents, You know, it's not like we were given any special skills right off the get go.
13:21
Right, our docs on papers did not come with an amazing manual for.
Parenting.
It did not.
We brought her home when she was five days old and we had to learn from the beginning we do nothing.
So what we have learned has come from trial and error and experimentation and research and study and, and actually like our focus has always been on what gets the results we want because results don't lie.
13:46
Not only gets the results we want, but also gets them in the framework of maintaining relationship with each child for the long run.
Ultimately, as parents, what we want our children to learn is how to manage and lead themselves.
Right.
14:01
Exactly.
That's been one of our primary outcomes.
We're not here to tell you what to do.
We're here to teach you how to lead yourself.
Yep, exactly.
Two, it comes at a cost to the relationship because inevitably for you as a parent to enforce any sort of discipline or punishment on a child, it requires force.
14:22
It requires a form of force.
And anytime you have to use force, you are weakening the relationship with your child because the truly strong relationship of trust and this we know this when we work with adults.
Like if you have to force someone or manipulate them to get them to do what you want, that's not healthy.
14:41
And the same is true with children.
People don't fully understand that your children are just little people and they deserve the same respect that you would treat any adult.
And so if you.
Have to force them an adult you admire.
And respect.
So if you have to force them to do something to in order to enact some sort of disciplinary measure, you are damaging the long term relationship.
15:06
Which is why then children and teens and adults grow up to resent their parents or to not have good relationships with them because of the tactics that were used on them while they were young that they still have married emotions about.
Right?
Like, it can get quite deep and complicated here.
15:24
Exactly.
I, I'm picturing in my mind like this foundation that every time, every time you yell, every time you threaten, every time you manipulate, every time you try to force or control, it's like taking a sledgehammer and just smacking the foundation.
And it might be little, little, you know, little chips coming out, little pieces breaking off, whatever.
15:43
But it's like the the pounding the stone, you hit it and hit it and hit it and hit it.
And, you know, at some point, eventually, they just push this big crack through it and.
Break well sure, I like that is now analogy as much because that's assuming there's already a foundation there and in fact, I think many parents approach parenting assuming that there is a foundation that I'm your parent, I've sacrificed for you, I gave birth to you, I fed you, I clothed you.
16:10
They're assuming that there's this foundation of trust when the reality is it's not there because for your child, they are oblivious to all of the things you have done for them.
You have to earn that trust with them every single day by the actions you now take with them today.
16:27
So if you're doing things that are quote UN quote, destroying this foundation, what you're really doing is you're just not building a foundation.
And unless you have a foundation of trust with your child, you have no influence over them or in their lives as a parent.
16:44
Building a foundation of trust starts from the moment they are born on the way.
How often you pay attention to their needs, whether you feed them when they need to be fed, whether you let them cry it out like.
And I'm, you know, for some people, I know this sounds extreme, but this is the foundation of human psychology here.
17:01
Your child is learning whether or not this is a safe world and they're surrounded by people they can trust by whether or not they're actually listened to as a baby.
And then it goes up from there to every interaction you have with them, to every word you say to them.
And I know that this feels so heavy.
17:19
It feels like such a huge weight that is even bigger than we can bear.
But the reality is, I've learned we can bear it.
We are strong enough.
We are their parents and we have the ability and capability to bear this burden and to be able to do it well and healthy and happily so that we can give them the foundation that they need in order to thrive as happy, well adjusted, competent, capable adults in this world.
17:47
It is a gigantic responsibility to raise a child to, to care for another human being and help them become a superb adult.
It's huge.
So if you have kids, you already have that responsibility.
18:06
You already have that weight.
No matter what you've done, if you didn't know better, you're listening to this and you're like, I didn't know.
Like, hey, we get it.
We're like, yeah, you didn't know, right?
So we're not going to be like, oh, you too.
Late, too late.
No, too bad.
You can make an adjustment today and start seeing better results immediately.
18:25
Exactly.
And over the long term see massive results in total transformations.
But you have to stop doing the things that are ineffective and start doing the things that are and effective.
And so, OK, to get into some of the strategies, the specifics, the skills, I think I truly believe that one of the best things you can do, stop doing the things that are causing damage.
18:50
And I would say if we want to use the emotional bank account analogy, because every single one of us has an emotional bank account with each person in our life, assume that that account is in the negative.
You are overdrawn, you have no capital, you have no credit like your account is overdrawn with that child.
19:09
I think that's pretty a pretty safe assumption.
Agreed.
So with that assumption, the very first thing you need to do is stop making withdrawals like you can't.
You're in debt.
You can't withdraw from that account and then start making deposits because you'll never get back to neutral and then into the positive.
19:28
If you don't start making deposits, you may have no clue what a deposit is for your child because maybe you've rarely made any at least recently.
But you could start getting specific about the withdrawals because you're going to know what sets your kid off.
You're going to know what makes them angry, or what makes.
19:43
Them maybe they don't know, I think very often.
They don't know then my in that case, I'm saying pay attention.
If you start paying attention, you're going to start noticing because you'll say something and it'll make them angry or upset.
That's a clue, right?
19:59
That something that just happened in that interchange is contributing to this anger.
Now, it may go deeper than that.
It may be a trigger that's reminding them of something you did before or said before.
So yeah, there's more complexity there, but the point is by being aware, it's going to help you uncover the the facts to get to the root.
20:23
We we get so fixated on on these ideas and we hold on to them so tightly.
Whether they came from our parents or a reaction to our parents, we picked them up.
Doing the opposite of what our parents did.
No, I I have to keep disciplining this kid so he doesn't think he can just do whatever he wants.
20:39
I'm like, yeah, well, how's that work out for you?
You've been doing it for months or years.
How's it going?
More importantly than whether it's getting the the quote UN quote result you want right now, in the moment, is it creating the relationship you want with them, not just for today, even though that's good, but also in the long term?
20:57
So ultimately, I think the the chassis, so to speak, of everything we're talking about is something we've used that's worked super, super well for us.
It's been so effective and it's been the fundamental philosophy our entire parenting journey.
21:13
It's just helping our kids understand like, hey, is this the kind of person you want to be?
Like genuinely helping them well, get clear about who they want to be.
And then it's easy mentoring there.
At that point, every single thing that comes up in life you can connect it to.
21:31
Is this the kind of person you want to be?
And I think even with that question, I feel that there's some subtlety involved because the underlying idea is I want to help you as my child, someone I love and adore, to become the very best version of themselves and to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve.
21:52
Not what I want.
Not what I want to achieve for you or want you to achieve for me.
I want to help you unlock your own potential.
I want you to be able to find happiness and joy in your own life, and so my role is to be a guide and mentor to that, not to be the controlling dictator that tells you exactly everything to do so that you get the outcomes that I want for you.
22:17
Exactly.
Even to the point of something so subtle is don't do that, it makes me feel sad.
Or when you do that, it makes me feel bad.
See what I'm doing there?
I'm trying to get them to stop a behavior and I'm attaching it to how I feel right?
Which is a form of manipulation.
22:33
Total manipulation.
And they go there like I should do good things because I don't want my mom to be sad.
I don't want my dad to be mad.
Like no, that's ridiculous.
You should be doing good things because you want to do good things because you want to feel good.
Right as part of the whole package also is helping them to develop confidence and capability, which is what you want for your child.
22:55
You want them to have confidence and capability in all sorts of skills, and the more confidence they build in different skills, the better off they're going to be.
Literally the more developed their brain is, like they just have more neural connections in their brain.
That's what you want for your child.
23:12
So ultimately there are a lot of skills and strategies that go into this.
Now when you learn what they are, I know at first it seems overwhelming because we're used to doing whatever it is we're doing, even if it's not getting the results that we want and we don't know how to change it.
We're creatures of habits, so it's already just a part of how we automatically respond.
23:33
But in reality, when you learn how to do those these things, I feel that hands down, it just makes the job of parenting so much easier.
I mean, we hear from people too often, unfortunately, who just talk about how parenting is so hard.
23:51
Like legit, my heart goes out to them, but also legit, I believe parenting is a joy.
Like I love parenting.
I sincerely love parenting.
And I think the biggest reason for that is because, one, I'm getting the outcomes I want and two, I have the relationships with my children that matter.
24:15
Like I have really great relationships with all of my kids.
And so it makes parenting a joy and a pleasure, but it doesn't have to be so hard.
There is a way to make it easier and to make it more enjoyable and.
24:31
It's it's with a skill set.
With the skill sets, what's?
So cool about is listening to you say that is with the skill set, it makes it so much easier and so much more effective.
If we just go back to the tennis analogy, like you're hands down, you're going to enjoy playing the game much more if you know how to play it and can actually hit the ball across and then hit it back.
24:52
Like if you can actually play the game, it's just way more fun to play them.
And so it's the same with parenting, that when you have the skills that help you quote play the game, it just makes it that much more enjoyable.
You actually enjoy doing it rather than feeling like it's just annoying.
Yeah, and so instead of a frustration, irritation, instead of yelling and tears and all that.
25:12
Every single day it's.
Actually, you enjoy parenting and your kids enjoy being parented.
Exactly.
It's amazing.
Fundamentally, we have to, I want to kind of shift gears a little bit here.
I want you to look at any situation or child and just ask yourself how have I contributed to this problem that I think has to be the first place to start.
25:36
So if you're having a particular difficulty with one child or all your children or with a situation, I think it's the last question to get asked if it ever gets asked.
And it's a hard one, but you stop and say, how have I contributed to this?
I think especially if we can tie that idea into the idea of the emotional bank account and whether you have been making deposits or withdrawals and then getting even more specific about what those deposits and withdrawals look.
26:02
Like 1 very common problem I see is they'll have a child, a son or daughter that's misbehaving a lot.
And whether it's like they're in there, it's, it could be as a toddler, but let's just go even older than that.
And, and you're like, why, what are they doing?
Why are they breaking things?
26:19
Why are they fighting, screaming, yelling, making disasters?
Like is resisting everything.
So often in in many many, many families I've been able to work with, the underlying issue was the child wanted attention and wasn't getting enough attention.
26:35
Well, which is connected to the fact that their emotional needs are not being met exactly and so.
So it's it's the the parents might be just racking their brains and they are, they come to me.
They're like this and this and this and this and this.
I'm trying this and I don't know, I don't know why they react to this.
26:52
And then it was different.
I don't know why.
And it was like, oh, the.
Common denominator.
The common denominator is way back upstream of their Their emotional needs aren't being met.
They don't feel like they're getting enough attention.
They don't feel loved and adored and careful.
They don't feel safety and security, like they're missing that.
27:10
And so all of these other things that seem unrelated, that seem disconnected, they're actually just little vehicles.
They're all just little subconscious vehicles the child's using to try to meet a need.
And so like, wait a minute, let's go back upstream and meet needs.
27:26
I would say that has to be one of the most important parenting skills we cultivate and develop is understanding and meeting our child's.
Needs, which is also making deposits.
It's the same thing as making deposits in that emotional bank account.
27:41
I was oftentimes things like that are happening with our children.
We're like, why are they being so loud and annoying and irritating and this and that?
Well, it's because this need they have is not being met.
And many of our kids have not learned how to articulate that.
27:58
So they'll often they don't even know to come and tell you like I need your attention right now.
I need to spend time with you.
They just jump right to crazy behavior because you're ignoring them, you're not giving them, you know, you're not looking at them, you're not touching them, you're not engaged with them, you're not mentally in the same room with them.
28:20
And so their response to that is some sort of quote UN quote misbehavior or acting out.
And so the more we can become aware of this, again, talking about helping things go right, we can start to prevent those things from happening.
28:36
On an overdrawn account, yeah.
You start making more withdrawals by yelling, getting frustrated, sending them off when what they truly really want and desire.
To need that would solve the problem.
Gentleness, love, and attention.
Attention, give them the attention they need and deserve, which a lot of parents want to do the opposite.
28:57
Like I'm not, I'm not going to give attention to that.
That's no way.
And and we do the exact opposite.
So we make the problem worse instead of like, oh, this behavior, it doesn't need discipline.
It needs.
Love.
Yeah.
And in fact, I remember very specifically as a young mother having this feeling.
29:17
And maybe it's a just a natural human feeling.
I don't know where when my children would do something to annoy me or to misbehave or what not, my response was anger or resentment or frustration.
And so I didn't want to give them love because I'm like, they don't deserve love right now because they're being such a little stinker.
29:35
And so my heart would harden, which then of course makes the problem worse and cut, makes the behavior worse because the very thing they want from you, because they're already feeling that in a little bit, they're feeling you closed off to them.
And then when you close and harden your heart more, it just perpetuates their bad behavior because they don't know what else to do but to try to somehow get your attention and love back, even though ironically they're doing things that you know, aren't love inducing.
30:07
But when we can learn to change that and to soften our hearts and say, Oh my gosh, my child is acting this way because they feel a lack of my love and attention and can then give that to them instead.
That's what helps things go right, powerful.
And then you don't have to discipline because you give them what they need, which is more love.
30:27
And then the behavior gets better because a child who a child who has their needs met.
Rarely miss babes.
It rarely misbehaves.
So that this is one of the key things we're talking about being like, this is a skill set we need to absolutely master is understand their needs and meet them.
30:43
And anytime there's any misbehavior, anything's off be like, is this somehow related to an unmet need?
And if we make that connection, that eliminates so many discipline.
Problems.
Right.
So powerful.
So I want to say because I'm sure parents are feeling a mix of depression and excitement and inspiration and overwhelm and you know, there's a lot of emotions going on here.
31:08
One thing I want to say is that you and I are actually recreating our Extraordinary Parent Mentoring Method course and we're going to be walking through and outlining all of these things in a very specific, directed, step by step manner that's going to help take all of these topics we're talking about and lay them out simply in a way that's easy to implement.
31:36
We'll have a link to it in this podcast in the show notes.
We truly believe that this is one of the most important skills you can learn.
You know, parenting is a very important job, and having children is very important for humanity, and raising great children is a key to creating a better society.
31:57
We can literally work together with our children to create big dreams and goals, to create a lasting legacy, to spread goodness to the rest of the world.
Like, we can do this together by starting with building a foundation with our children so that as they grow up and we're starting to see, you know, we're really moving into this phase of seeing this payoff, that then they become adults who are truly your friends.
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So it, it all comes back to these, these skills and we're going to outline those skills.
We outlined a bunch here, but we're going to do more in that parenting course.
So this is the most important work we do.
It'll I mean, think, think about, you know, all, all the years that you have kids in your home.
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That's kind of the intense part of it.
But then for the rest of your life too, when they're adults and they're on, they're out having their own kids, it plays into all this.
So once you have children from that point forward, oh, you do as a parent is going to be a part of your life.
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It's going to affect your life, the quality of your life.
And whether you're happy or fulfilled or miserable and unfulfilled, like this matters so much.
And so we have to give it the attention and effort that it deserves and become really, really good at the important part of parenting so that it eliminates most of the problems and it totally can be done.
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So love you guys.
Thanks for listening.
Reach upward.