#71 Never Settle For Less Than Your Best

Rachel Denning (00:01.262)
Hey, hey my friends, welcome to another episode of the Extraordinary Family Life podcast. Thanks for being here. I wanna kinda have a heart to heart with you today. Thanks for being awesome, thanks for listening. The fact that you're listening to this says a lot about you and how you're doing life, that you are a go -getter and you're ambitious and you have desires and goals and you wanna...

You want to live intentionally and deliberately and do something with yourself. I frequently meet people who on the outside of they seem to not really care about making the most of themselves and going after life. They just kind of seem to be living by default mode or, or have kind of given up hope and man, it just breaks my heart because you guys, that's, that's the greatest, that's the greatest thing about being a human being is we have the privilege and opportunity. And I think responsibility.

to make the most of ourselves so that we can choose, we can choose to be who we want to be. And so I celebrate you and applaud you and praise you for striving to be good people. Life's tough, life's challenging. Working with people is challenging. Right? man, working with human beings is tough. And then life just naturally kind of throws its challenges out, right? And so thank you.

And I honor you for continuing to plug away, to keep pushing, to keep striving to grow and improve and work through the challenges and difficulties of life and do the hard things. It matters. It matters so much. We're going to talk about that today and how we can really just make a big transformation in our lives. I got to tell you though, like I went, so stuck down this, I got a chance to go skydiving again. And I just.

I don't know what it is you guys I know some of you are gonna think I'm out of my mind but there is just something so wonderful about jumping out of an airplane a perfectly good airplane just bombing out of that thing and it was a there's a great young couple great young men staying here with us for a few weeks and one of them turned 21 on his birthday here so I'm mentoring and coaching him and and I thought you know I'm gonna surprise him because he'd talked about wanting to go skydiving you know and I'm like boom that's a perfect surprise so

Rachel Denning (02:26.958)
We surprised him and bought him a ticket to go skydiving. man, it was just a great experience and I got this great instructor, super great guy, and I said, hey look, I want to have some fun jumping out of that plane. Let's make it real. And he's like, well, he says my record is five backflips going out of the plane. I said, let's go for it. So he and I did five backflips out of that plane. It was awesome. Wow, it was fun. Just a perfect day.

Beautiful weather, clear skies and cold crisp air. man, it was awesome. You just feel so alive and have so much fun. I love those things. All right, let's dive in.

So, of all the things on Earth...

Rachel Denning (03:16.526)
Human beings have this power to choose, to think. So I'm looking right now, I'm looking out, there's these big, beautiful forests and a lake behind my house. And I'm looking out at these trees. And they really don't have a choice. It's just, it's in them. They grow. And whatever's in the seed, it just grows to, it's.

It's full potential, you know, and obviously the depending on circumstances, if it's, if the seed falls on the rocks or if there's not much rain or sun or these outside influences affect it, which is another element of, of this conversation, right? That we can adjust when things we fall on the rocks, we can pick ourselves up and move to another spot, right? If there's not enough rain, we can create some rain. I can make it rain, right? We can, we can change our circumstance. We can pick up and move and make a difference, but there's not a whole lot of choice and.

And what I want to talk about today, the context here is like choosing to be our best and never ever settling my friends just write it in your heart and your mind right now. I will not settle for anything less than my best self. Can you imagine a tree just kind of going up a little ways and like, you know, I'll just stop here. I'll stop here. I'm supposed to be a giant Sequoia, but I'll just stop here at maybe about, you know, 20 feet.

That's this is good for me, because I don't want to struggle strain anymore. Can you imagine, you know, anything in creation with the wonder and the greatness and beauty, just say, nah, I'm good. I'm good right here. And it's interesting that sometimes in life, human beings just stop.

They just settle for far less than they're capable. Let, let, let the magnitude of that settle in for a minute. I know I've done it. I know I've done it. Maybe you have too, where you just, you just say, nah, this is good enough. And

Rachel Denning (05:22.669)
And honestly, like, I love, I love and honor the freedom to choose this agency we have where we can make choices. But man, sometimes and you felt it with your own decisions and with people you love when they make decisions. Sometimes that freedom to choose is a curse instead of a blessing. You're like, no, no. Right? Why? Why did I choose to be less than my best? Why did they choose to be less than our best? And today I want to.

I want to talk about this drive, this commitment to excellence, to your personal greatness, to just this absolute refusal. No one's going to police you.

Yeah, there's no, nobody's gonna give you a ticket or a fine or throw you in some kind of personal development prison because you settled for less. In fact, there may not be anybody but you and God who really knows what you're capable of. In fact, the vast majority of the time, you and I, we don't even know what we're capable of. Capable of, where's your full potential? How high could you go? How far could you go?

How fast could you go if you were operating at full potential?

Whoa. And so I want to invite and challenge us to go after our absolute very best. To strive, to strain, to push, to pull, to jump, to run, to do everything we can to totally transform ourselves from where we are into who we can become.

Rachel Denning (07:10.221)
Right. And let this sink in. It's cool. Like in a big, big picture sense, like the full life sense, you know, heaven would be that when, when the, you know, you, you get to the end of your life or you get to the next life, you meet this potential you, so to speak, you have this imaginary meeting with the potential you of who you could have become. Right. You're full.

the fullness of your greatness and glory that's in you. And heaven would be to get there and feel like you're looking in the mirror. And hell would be to get there. And when the person you are meets the person you might have been.

Rachel Denning (07:57.613)
and genuinely, my friends, it is a matter of choice. It really is. It's what we choose. We can choose to strive and grow and push and pull and strain and struggle and work and skip and have fun. Like just with a smile on our face. Sometimes we get so serious and I do this too. Sometimes we get so serious about serious things that we forget this. We can smile. We can still do serious things. We can still do hard things and do it with a smile on with a skip in our step.

I can get blisters on my hands and still jump from place to place, you know, the next hole and get going. Right. I can, I can do the hard work and still be jovial. And so I want to, I want to challenge us today to take every area of our life and create this transformation. I'm talking every area of our lives where we dig in deep and we absolutely refuse to settle on any aspect. Now you guys, this, you know what's awesome about right now?

is that we're coming to the end of the year, but also to the end of a decade. So 2020 is right around the corner. It's the end of a decade. And I want you to think about that. I love beginnings and endings because it's an awesome chance to take an evaluation. And we've got to do consistent evaluations. The higher we want to travel, the further we want to go in life, the more often we have to do evaluations. We have to check because if we're off a little bit, even a little bit of poor judgment.

A little error in our thinking in the long run, the big distance, if we're going somewhere great with our life and my friends, you, you better be going somewhere. You better set those sights high and go for something special for you. And it doesn't have to do anything with anybody else. It's about you. What's your potential? What's your greatness? It is not contrasted or compared with other people. It's the greatness that's in you.

Where is that? How high is that? How far is that? How great is that? And because it's a high, it's a great, great height, we have to measure often. So make sure these little errors in judgment, just a little bit, if we're going down the block, if we're only trying to make it to the next weekend, little error in judgment may not be that far. But if we're going to the heights of greatness,

Rachel Denning (10:19.629)
little error in judgment repeated again and again is going to get us way off course and it's so hard to get back on and we get into this point where we settle so why is it that people settle well they might be afraid might be afraid of what it's gonna take they might get tired tired of the effort that's in there they might be distracted we live in the age of distraction

You might be discouraged. You might have lost hope. And so we're filled with self -doubt.

And there's all kinds of reasons. But again, the great news is, the exciting news is, it literally is a choice. So now with the year ending and a decade ending, you can say, how am I doing? What was the last year like? What was the last decade like? Whoo, that is awesome. Think about that.

2010.

You know what's crazy? It's exactly 10 years ago, we were here in Georgia.

Rachel Denning (11:38.349)
That's crazy. Just for a few months, and now we've come back. We've been here just for a few weeks. Exactly 10 years ago we were here, and we hadn't been back in between that time. Whoa, that's awesome. That's super awesome. And when I look back, all the things we've done and all the place we've been just literally circled this globe and been all over and added children to our family and done just unbelievable amounts of.

bucket list things and grown and learn and averaged about a book a week over that last decade. And, and wow, wow. So awesome. But there's so many things also that I wish I, and I know and wish I would have done better. I know I could have done better and wish I would have done better. I'm reaping those rewards. And I know.

There are things that I just nailed. I just hit it and nailed it and just can celebrate that. But there's things where I settled. I settled for less than my best.

No more, my friends, no more. And I'm not talking about the things that don't matter. If there's things that are genuinely and just truly unimportant, don't do those things, don't worry about them. Just remove them from your life. If they're genuinely unimportant, don't worry about them. But if they are important, if they do count, let's go after it. Now, a little side note here before we get into the details of this.

The clearest indication, we gotta be serious about our future. We just looked at the last 10 years, boom. What about the next 10 years? So 10 years from now in 2030, you're gonna be 10 years older. Those years are coming. And whether you do something about it or not, they're coming. 10 years are gonna pass, you're gonna be there in 10 years. And you could either have spent 10 years settling for less than your best, or you could spend 10 years striving for your best. And in 10 years, my friends, you can absolutely, 100 % totally transform your life. Your current conditions,

Rachel Denning (13:44.141)
have nothing to do with that. Your current circumstances will only stop you if you let them. If you settle. Do not let your current circumstances be the boundaries and the borders for your future life. In 10 years from now, you can be a totally new person, totally transformed, totally reworked and redone and rocking it.

Whoa, you look at the greats, right? You look at the greats, the true masters across any genre. They say it usually takes 10 years to get going, to just make the transformation, to get to that greatness. And then they'll keep going for 15, 20, 30 years. But in 10 years, they can achieve greatness. In 10 years, even if you are starting from zero, even if you are starting negative, some of you may have made some poor decisions that you're like almost in a negative position.

In 10 years, you can be wherever you want to be.

Now you might be saying, that's so far away. It's so far out.

It's coming and it'll pass as fast as the last 10 did or faster actually. And it'll go and we got to go with it. So here's the clearest indication. You ready? You with me? This is exciting stuff. I love this. The clearest indication of your future condition is your current habits. Jot that down. The clearest indication of your future condition.

Rachel Denning (15:23.693)
is your current habits.

The clearest indication of your current habits, you ready for this one? This one is so powerful. The clearest indication of your current habits are the things you do when no one is around to hold you accountable.

Rachel Denning (15:53.197)
Okay, what do you do when no one is around to hold you accountable? What do you turn to? What is your default? What are you doing with yourself?

in those times, because you get what I'm saying here, because you might have to, you know, you go, let's say you're taking a university class, you have, you have a professor there, you have somebody, you know, grading you and you, you're, so there's somebody taking attendance or whatever, you know, you're, you're accountable to someone, you go to a job and you have a manager or a boss, somebody making sure you, you come to work on time and you do the work you're supposed to, you have somebody you report to, you have somebody you're accountable for, right? What are you doing?

when no one is there to hold you accountable.

That right there, what you do with your free time and your free thinking and your free space when you have total freedom, you're thinking back to this power of choice we started with, right? What do you choose? Do you choose to settle? Do you choose to be less than you are? Do you choose to remain a little deformed bush instead of this gigantic tree? Can you imagine an eagle being born with the potential to soar?

with majesty and power and say, nah, you know, I don't think I'm gonna fly. I think these chickens here, they got something to figure out. They walk around with their heads down, plucking the ground all day looking for bugs. I think that's my destiny. what a tragedy. what a tragedy. So what are you doing with your free time? What are you doing with your freedom? That's a big indication. And get really clear about that. Get really honest about that.

Rachel Denning (17:39.437)
really really honest about that. What are you doing with your free space and time?

That right there is gonna give you an indication of where you're going. And again, the great news is it's a choice. You can choose. Just choose it. Choose it. Choose to do different things, better things, to level up. Choose to not settle anymore. To own it. To take absolute full, powerful ownership of every part of your life. So let's dive into that now. If you're saying, you know what, okay, Greg, I'm with you, man, let's do this.

Boom, we are not settling for less than our best. We're going after it. It's a new year. It's a new decade. It's going to be a new me. And you get to start a new life. Isn't that cool? Isn't that exciting? I talked to somebody recently who said, you know, we're starting, we're starting a new marriage inside of our marriage. Right? They're starting over. They're calling it their second marriage inside their current marriage. Right? Because.

They had some struggles and some strain and some, some challenges, difficulties. And you know, we're going to start, we're going to start a new marriage. We're going to start a second marriage. Right. And, and we're going to, we're going to start this over and do things differently. And you can create an entirely new you. Did you know your body does that? Your cells regenerate. And so your, your body's is creating new cells all the time. And so actually it actually reworks your whole body. And so the old skin cells die and they fall off and you get new ones and it's regenerating. And so your body's is making it new.

And so you're a new you, but some of us hold on to the old you. This is the old me, I'm gonna hold on the old way. And we hold on to our old thinking and our old habits and our old programming and our old mindsets and our old beliefs. And it holds us down. It's like this ball and chain, this weight and anchor, this drag. It's just holding us back when we could be completely new. And so my friends, in order to not settle, to never settle,

Rachel Denning (19:43.085)
We have to get a clear picture about the holistic self. And I want to invite you and challenge you to join me in this next year to get in the best health of your life. Yes, it is possible. Even if you're older and even if you've given birth to all kinds of cute little kiddos and even if you're working hard and even if you've had some injuries.

Yes, you can get in phenomenal health. Yes, you. Yeah, I'm talking to you. You can do this and you can eat better. And you guys, these things, look, I want to give you an invitation to two invitations here for mindset. Number one, mindset I want you to adopt and just embrace is I can figure this out, right? Write that down. I can figure this out. Just believe that whatever you're doing, whatever you're trying, whatever you're attempting, whatever you're struggling with,

Just believe that in your head. I can figure this out and say it again and again and again and again. Just drill it in your mind that that is your mindset. I can figure this out. Whatever it is, whatever you're facing, whatever it is you want to do, say, I can figure this out. You don't have to be perfect at it. You don't have to know right now. You just have to believe I can figure this out and then get to work. And the second thing is you have to have this, this, this conviction like this, this

drive this desire like, whoa, I'm going to do it because it's easy to do. And it's also easy not to do. Sometimes we sometimes we tell ourselves that, it's so hard. It's so difficult. Like, like changing how you eat, right? You're not going on a diet because you want to diet and you get back off and you're going to get the same results you got before. You're actually transforming your relationship with food. That's easy to do.

but it's also easy not to do. Now, for some of you, you, in your mindset, you might have this belief right now, like, it's so hard to do. I tried it in the past. It didn't work. I tried this. I tried that. it's so hard. It's so hard. And a lot of it's built around this mindset. So just believe, Hey, it's easy to do and it's easy not to do, but I'm going to do it. I'm committed. And so you can transform what you eat and you can transform exercise and movement, the way you carry your body, the way you look, you can have the best body of your life.

Rachel Denning (22:07.917)
this next year. How many of you excited about that? Right? I'm in fantastic shape right now and I plan on even getting in better shape. And I hope some of you who are ready for this will come climb Mount Kilimanjaro with us in 11 months. So in 2022, October, 2020, we're going to climb Kilimanjaro. In fact, I think in between there, I just kind of said another little personal goal. I think I'm going to fly down for a weekend to Ecuador.

and climb Cotopaxi just, just for training. It's over 19 ,000. Right? Just go hit that thing. Let me get the best shape of my life. I hope that's exciting to you. Rework your health and your body. What you eat, what you do, how you move, how you feel, how you look, wake up with energy, rework your sleep. Okay. Rework your marriage or your coming marriage.

Rework your mindset, your mental health. Whereas just as you create this mind of strength, right, you weaponize that mind where it is just, it is just on and it's ready and prepared, right? Your emotional state. You're in charge of those emotions instead of just allowing them to just run wild with whatever in the world is going on.

And let, you know, instead of allowing people to sway you back and forth and all over the place, you own that space. And you feel the way you want to feel. You get up each morning, you choose the emotion and you hold onto it.

Rachel Denning (23:52.429)
and your excitement for life. You actually get up in a positive state and you're excited about what you're gonna do. And you go to the bed each night fulfilled. And you do a quick evaluation of how you did. Are you living in alignment with who you wanna be and how you wanna do life? And you go to bed at night, you lay down like, I feel so good. That's what we're going for, my friends. And yes, all of this is possible. I know some of you right now are doubtful.

But if you've struggled with this, you've challenged this, it literally is knowledge and skills. The only thing standing in between you and your full potential is some knowledge and a set of skills. And some tools and some resources. And this is, that's literally what I do. This is my life's work to give you the tools and resources you need to become your absolute best self.

And so from the way you sleep at night to the way you get up in the morning, the way you do your morning routines, the way you go throughout your day, the way you interact with your children, with your spouse, with other people and every aspect of your life from your intimate relationship and to your friendships and to your leadership and to your hobbies and to the things you do for fun and to those few skills that you are going to master.

that you're gonna give the next 10 years to, to just dominate.

Right? Whoa. And making this happen. Look, you guys are go -getters. You're high achievers. You have the big dreams and the visions and the ambitions. And you're working hard. You're putting an effort and the drive and the discipline. And you have the talents and skills. You're awesome people. So acknowledge that. Celebrate that. Like get up there, but don't get up and then settle into a plateau.

Rachel Denning (25:53.773)
Some of you are on a plateau, and I've been there, where you reach a level and then you just kind of level off and you stay on the plateau and you get stuck. You get stuck at a certain level of finances, you get stuck in a certain way of your relationships or a certain level of energy. And that's when we need help. That's when we need a coach, a mentor, to help us keep climbing. And what's powerful about that, you guys,

is a great coach has a way of seeing you in ways that you cannot see yourself.

And great coaches are expensive because they've been down the road. They've done things. In fact, the best ones charge over a million dollars a year to work with them. Isn't that awesome? But there's a code. There's a formula, right? And what the formula we're focused on is the extraordinary family life formula. And the question isn't whether the formula works. It's whether you work the formula.

Right? Let that sink in. This is so powerful.

And I hope you're ready. I hope you're ready for this. man. I hope you're ready to invest. I hope you're ready to, to dedicate.

Rachel Denning (27:15.309)
your energy, your resources. It's an investment. It's an investment. Whatever you do. To reach your potential is an investment. That's what I'm talking about. It's an investment to reach your potential. It's an investment in effort, in time, and sacrificing the things that aren't taking you where you want to go. But being all in. And you guys, the greats, the greats in every area of life.

They're all in they're dedicated to what they do they they they're they mean so much to them. They're like, I'm doing this thing. And they go after it. And they all have coaches, by the way. Every one of them. The greatest Olympians in the world. They're they're at the top. And they still have coaches and they're at the top because they have coaches and the greatest executives in the world. They have coaches. Even the best coaches in the world have coaches. Excuse me, this this is awesome. So

My challenge, my invitation for all of us, myself included, I'm in, I'm all in. Like I'm going after it. Like I've been going after it for years. And I, we've created an extraordinary family life. We've tested it. We've tried it. We've shared it. We've taught it. I've taught it all around the world. I mean, just living it and practicing and training. I'm still in it. I'm still going after it. And you guys, I'm going for the next level. Watch out. Cause I'm going, I'm going to the next level. And that means I have to grow. It means I have to improve.

It means I have to push my limits. It means I have to get uncomfortable. I have to deal with inconvenient things. I have to learn how to juggle more and balance more and do more and be more. And do it in this healthy, wonderful way where I'm, I'm joyful and contented and peaceful and driven and I'm achieving and accomplishing. And so don't

Drift another day of life. Do not drift. Do not coast because there's no coasting to the top my friends. Wake up from this walking coma. Do not waste another moment. Decide to live again, to act now, to get up, to take action, to make today the beginning of your new life. And don't wait for New Year's!

Rachel Denning (29:40.269)
Do... Can I yell at you for a minute? Do not wait for New Year's, people! Come on! We get in this little pattern, a perfect rut here, where we wait around for New Year's. And so instead of making progress, instead of giving ourselves an advantage, instead of finishing strong, finishing this year and this decade strong, well, I'll just start on New Year's, and I'll just eat poorly and...

neglect my health and my relationships and my work and kind of drift and drag and coast and and then we'll start our New Year's and honestly this is statistically true. By February most people have have broken their New Year's resolution or entirely forgotten them. They don't even remember what resolutions they made. Don't be like that. You can't afford to be like that because that's not who you are and you're going after your full potential not just whatever.

You're going to make things happen.

So let's go after it. Don't drift again. And be willing my friends to invest.

I'm going to, I'm just going to speak bluntly right here and like, get a coach. I would love to work with you, but if you work, if you don't work with me, great. You just get a coach. You've got to have coaching and mentoring. If you want to reach your full potential, that is an absolute requirement and coaching. Like I said, the greats have coaches and we can see you in a way you can't see yourself and it's personalized. It's customized.

Rachel Denning (31:17.837)
I help you maximize your potential and give you the tools and resources you need to become your absolute very best self. If you're struggling, if you're straining, if it's not working, if things are off in your life right now and you, you don't know why, or you know why, but you don't know what to do about it. And you're not where you want to be. You're not just thriving and growing. Sign up with a coaching session for me. And you guys, like I'm not trying to just sell. This isn't just so I can sell you, although I really want to persuade you.

to do this. This isn't about me. It's about you. It's about becoming your very best. Get dialed in. Like you deserve it. You need it like and other people are depending on you who needs you to do this. Who needs you to have your absolute very, very best year your best self the best decade where literally every part of your life, you're just

rocking it. And yes, it's possible. You just need the right tools and resources, the right knowledge and the right skillset. You can make this happen in an extraordinary way and be happy and more fulfilled and thriving. And I know it seems for a lot of you feeling overwhelmed, just even listening to me, like, no, I can't handle anymore. But that's the point with the right tools and strategies, you can actually handle more and handle it well.

where it's easier. It's genuinely easier. Where the things you're doing right now will seem super easy and comfortable because you have grown into them, right? You increase your capacity. You owe it to yourself. You owe it to the people who need you and love you. Just let's make this happen. Let's go after it. Like everything I'm doing is for this. Like this is my mission. This is my life's work to help you.

Join me in this quest for personal greatness to become our absolute very best to choose to use our freedom for growth, for progression, for impact, for service, for making a positive difference in the world.

Rachel Denning (33:31.469)
Whoa, let's do this thing. Let's do it together. Join me and let's go. Let's finish strong this year in this decade and be ready to make 2020 the best, absolute best year. And I know this is, I'm not talking cliche, little rah rah, like I'm serious. Let's get strategy. Let's get planned. Let's get serious about this. Let's get a little bit in your face here.

and call it out, just have this honest assessment of where you are and where you're going, and never, never settle for less than your best because awesome is always an option, my friends. Reach upward.

Rachel Denning (34:20.301)
Hey everybody, thanks so much for listening to this episode. I hope you got a lot of value out of it and found some things that you can apply to your life right away. Hey, I'm being totally sincere when I say I live to help you live your extraordinary life. So I hope you'll reach out to me if you have any questions or let me know how I can help you in any important area of your life. And in fact, you know, this podcast is brought to you by the School of Awesome Sauce monthly coaching program. Take advantage of that, get in there. It's the -

best way to get a breakthrough to the next level so you can level up your health, your spirituality, your emotions, your mind, your relationships, your finances, business, every part of your life. Just get in there where you have a coach and a mentor, you have a supportive community to make things happen. So jump in there, take advantage of this, try it out, get in there with us and level up your life. See you on the inside. Reach upward.