#76 Are You Actually Doing What MUST Be Done?

Rachel Denning (00:01.646)
Hello, all you awesome people. man, it is just another great day to be alive. I got up super early today.

went and did a presentation, studied, learning, and now I'm like, I'm, I'm lakeside right now. You can hear the leaves crunching under my feet and it's a kind of a beautiful, cold, overcast morning. it's good. Can I, well, first let me just say that you're awesome and, keep, keep going. Actually, I wasn't going to talk about this, but I feel like I need to share this. Keep going, please keep.

Keep pushing, keep striving, don't give up hope. It's so easy to get discouraged and to throw in the towel. So don't give up, keep pushing, keep hoping, keep seeking, keep working, keep plugging along, doing the things you know you need to do. And I would say especially, especially when you don't seem to be getting the results you want and need in your life.

Keep going, keep working on the things that you know work. And just keep, you guys keep hoping on, keep your head up. Don't allow discouragement to get you down. And don't allow just that crushing sense of defeat and despair.

to get you. And let me say this, man, this is totally different from anything I was gonna say to you guys today. But I gotta say it. Don't let the despair get to you, especially if it's because of your own mistakes. And you're owning your own responsibility, right? And you realize that you blew it.

Rachel Denning (02:12.27)
that can be just crushing. Actually, this fits perfectly with what I'm gonna talk about today. That can be crushing. And we can go from one defeat to another and from one failure to another by allowing the despair of one failure or mistake to keep us from making the right course correction. Please don't do that. Just decide.

to get back up, dust yourself off, get back in the game, whatever you've done, whatever mistakes you've made, you can change, you can alter it, you can fix it, you can make it right, and maybe not, maybe there's some things that you can't make right that are done, but let them be done. Let them stay in the past and you move forward to create a new future. Like to move forward with that. man. Whoa, I almost fell in the lake.

That was crazy. Okay. Whoo. I won't try to step on any logs Whoa, I literally almost went right in the lake. That was that would have been really funny. Okay So the word repent Don't worry. I'm not preaching here. The word repent comes from a Latin base to rethink Pent like in Spanish pens are right It's to rethink. So all you're doing is just changing your thinking so

To repent in a case like this where you made mistakes or whatever, you have failures, to repent means to rethink, to just get a new look, a new outlook, just new thinking. And we all know this, like when we change our thinking, we change our lives because it changes our desires, our thoughts, our emotions, our feelings, and our actions, behaviors, and habits. So we change our thinking. So to repent is to think differently, think new, just get some new thinking about a situation or a relationship.

or yourself get clarity about who you are and how you interact with other people and the principles and practices that govern your life, right? Those three things. We get clear about that and whoa, we can create a new you, a new life, new circumstances, new outcomes, new results. this is good. this is good. Okay. Now to today, to today's topic.

Rachel Denning (04:27.726)
I want to start out with, and this is why it fits so well, of a gigantic mistake I made. In my journal, in end of 2008, beginning of 2009, I wrote down my action plans. The things that I knew that I needed to do. So we're talking 10 or 11 years ago.

I wrote down the things that I knew I needed to do. Like, hey, if I'm gonna change things, and this was particularly with business stuff and impact stuff, these are the things I need to do. And I wrote it down. I had it, I had the answer. I had the clarity. I'd sought for the answers, I'd found the answers. I wrote it down like, this is it.

To my deep remorse and regret.

I didn't do it.

I didn't do it. I didn't do the things that I needed to do. Now I dabbled in them and I made feeble attempts and I told myself, I'm trying. Right? You guys ever done that? Or just me? I'm trying. it's too hard. And I blamed my circumstances and I can't, I can't do everything. And I.

Rachel Denning (05:57.294)
I told myself stories about how I was doing it and I was getting to it, right? I'm going to, I'm going to. But like somebody said, you can't build a reputation on things you're going to do. Write that down. You can't build a reputation on things you're going to do. In fact, you can't get results by all the things you're going to do. And so I didn't do it. Actually,

Here's the crazy part, this one kills me. Man, this one kills me. I started a podcast in 2010 and I did maybe 10 or 15 episodes and then I stopped.

And how that just gets to me because if I had kept going, even if I'd only done like one a week or every other week, I would have hundreds of episodes and I would have built this gigantic platform. I would have been so much further ahead in the thing I wanted and needed to do, but I didn't do it. I put it off.

Made excuses, I told myself stories. At the end of the day, I didn't follow through with the things I needed and wanted to do. man, this gets to me. But am I gonna sit around mourning that, regretting it? Nope, I'm actually gonna get after it. Here's what's even worse, you guys. And maybe you guys can relate to me, or maybe not, maybe you guys are just rock stars and you just hit everything you ever do and when you know you need to do it, you nail it.

But I'm guessing some of you can relate to me that several years after that, I went back and read through those journals and I was like, come on, Greg, you didn't do it. You knew you needed to do it. You didn't do it. You're like, okay, it's got to change. You got to do it. And I started up for a little bit and then went off again and didn't do it. Okay. So the second time, the second time I knew I needed to do it and I didn't do it.

Rachel Denning (08:08.302)
So finally now, like I'm owning it. And this is just in one specific area of things I knew I needed to work on, right? I wanted to do to have greater impact and influence. Other things I stuck to and just nailed them, like you have to, right? There's certain things you have just nailed. You've just hit those things day in and day out with consistency and it's awesome. But then I'm suspecting...

you're like me that there's some areas in your life and you've just been like, yeah, I know I've needed to do that for a long time. And you just haven't even slacking off. So today, today is, is this, this wake up call, this call to arms, this reminder and encouragement, inspiration, motivation, like my friends, it is time to get it done. Yeah. That thing you've been avoiding.

that dream you stopped chasing, that leveling up you know you need to do, it's today. It starts today. I can sing that song to you from the greatest showman. It starts today, from now on. What's waited till tomorrow starts tonight. my friends, it has to. And so here's what I want you to do. And actually we're gonna.

We're going to go through this thoroughly in the extraordinary family life monthly coaching to finish this year and this decade really strong and get totally set up for success for 2020 and the next decade, because we have to set up systems. My friends, we have to set up systems that guarantee our success. The problem is most of us have systems set up to guarantee our failure like I did.

I had stories and create, I had creative excuses and reasons and justification and rationalization. I had set myself up mentally and physically to fail.

Rachel Denning (10:14.286)
But what we have to do is we have to set up systems that guarantee our success. And so here's, here's the beginning of this exercise. I want you to think right now, like this is what I want, right? Get really, really clear because I want this and know exactly what it is. For some of you, it's going to be to get in fantastic shape. For some of you, it's going to be to start a business. For some of you, it's going to be able to grow that business.

For some of you it's gonna be to repair a relationship. For some of you it's gonna start new relationships. For some of you it's gonna be to heal from past mistakes or trauma. To let go of the past. For some of you it's to get your family in order. For some of you it's your education. For some of you it's a new skill set. Something you know you need to nail.

For some of you it's to figure out balance in life. And for some of you, most of you, you guys are ambitious. I know who you are. I know who you are. I talk to you all the time. You're like, it's everything, Greg. It's all of it. I'm ready to level up. I'm ready to hit it all and just be firing on all levels. So if you're with me, that's how I am. I'm like, okay, it's all of it. It's all of it.

But I want you to go through one by one and say, because I want to do this, I want to achieve this thing. I want to just nail it. I always want to crush it. I want to just achieve and succeed in this area of my life. Then or therefore I have to what? What's that thing? That most of us lack that kind of clarity.

Or we might even be like, well, yeah, you know, I need, I definitely need to do this better or do that better. But we haven't gotten to the point of, ooh, if I want, because I want to succeed in this thing, I have to, I must do this, right? And so it's just an equation. Because I want to achieve X, I must do Y. What is your Y? And yes, that's a play on words because there's a lot of meaning there. What's your Y?

Rachel Denning (12:30.574)
What is it the thing you absolutely must do? Then you can reverse engineer that and say, if I don't do Y, then I will not get X. I will not have the results I want.

Let me give you some examples.

Rachel Denning (12:45.998)
Well, you know what? This first one, it applies to all of us. I don't care who you are, what you want. This applies to all of us because you have to, you and I, we have to have energy and clarity if we're gonna crush it. And so every one of us needs to get to bed at a decent hour and get some good sleep.

Rachel Denning (13:14.926)
Get your behinds into bed and asleep. And I'm talking to myself. We gotta do it. Like super high achievers, you guys, they're in bed at nine o 'clock. They're out, their lights out. And there's research behind that, why? And then they're getting up three, four, five a and getting after their stuff. Now you might be like, I can't do that. I'm not a morning person.

I can't, I hate mornings. it's so hard for me. and we can, we can, we can go on with our stories and excuses or we can get results. My friends, we've got to get our behinds into bed and asleep and get good sleep so we can wake up and our bodies are regenerated and recovered and renewed. So our minds are fresh and clear. We've got to get to bed. That's a big one. Right? So now look, you can, you can keep staying up late.

keep watching Netflix and scrolling on Wastagram and just twiddle farting around and doing whatever, you can keep doing that. But you gotta be really clear, you're gonna keep getting the same results.

If we keep doing the same things we've been doing, my friends, then tomorrow's gonna look like today and next year's gonna look like this year. And the next decade's gonna look like the last one.

What are the things you know you have to do? If you want to just crazy level up and really be able to show up in every way, you got to eat really good food consistently in the right portions. Right? If you want to just have a domination in a certain area of life, if you want to just own it outright, whatever that is, whether it's homeschooling or parenting or starting your business or

Rachel Denning (15:09.614)
you know, having impact or influence with your kids or your community. If it's, you know, creating an awareness, whatever your mission is, right? Whatever your marketing or, or whatever your work is. Maybe you, you work in, you're in finances or.

sales or whatever it is. Like if you want to own that, you have to study it. You have to become an expert. You have to become what they call a category king or queen. Like that has to be your domain. You have to choose that thing and own it. So, so this, your equation is if I want to become a category queen, then I have to study it and know it.

backwards and forwards. I have to know I have to be so familiar with this. I don't have to look up the answers. I can just recall them like like snap my fingers. I've got the answers. I know it is so familiar to me. I get I eat drink and sleep this stuff like I got it. You can wake me up in the middle of the night and I'll tell you exactly what what you need to know. That's that's what you have to do. And then what about the skill set? Like if you're going to achieve something.

fantastic. And again, we're going after our dumb goals, right? You guys know about the dumb goals, demanding, unrealistic, meaningful, and bold. If you're going after your dumb goals, it requires a set of skills. It always does. I don't care what we're going after. Every single thing we're trying to achieve requires a set of skills. Being married and having an extraordinary marriage that requires a set of skills. Get in great shape.

Rachel Denning (16:54.094)
having friends.

great friendships, having great social skills to be able to have meaningful conversations, be able to influence and persuade others. It requires a set of skills. So every single area of your life where you want to level up, you want to achieve something in the next year, in the next decade, it's going to require a set of skills. That is going to demand that you and I practice, and not just any old practice. Because you guys, I could...

I could pick up my violin and just kind of practice. I'm not going to get anywhere. But if I do deliberate, intentional, designed practice where I'm going after specific things in a specific way that's researched and has proven results, now I'm going to get the results I want.

And so we have to develop that set of skills. you guys, are you feeling this? This is exciting stuff. So today, look, with all the love I have, I love you. I want to encourage you, cheer you on and call you out a little bit, myself too, looking in the mirror and saying, Hey, you know what, friend? It's time to own this. It's time to own this. I have to have that crystal clarity. If I in any way, shape or form expect to or hope to get the outcomes I'm after, then I'm.

must do those things and stop putting them off. Stop making excuses. Stop telling myself the stories and make it give it so much meaning in my life that men other things may get neglected, but not this thing, not this thing. I, and for some of you, it's going to be like, you need to get rid of your TV.

Rachel Denning (18:42.286)
Boom, I said it. Ha ha, I said it. For some of you, you need to get rid of your TV. And yes, I mean, get rid of it.

Here's the funny thing we do. You guys, have you guys done this? Where you feel like, yeah, I need to do something a little more drastic. And you're like, come on, don't be fanatical. Don't be extreme. You don't have to go that far. You know what? Sometimes you do. People who are high performers and great achievers, they do drastic things. They'll do things like getting rid of their TV, canceling their Netflix subscription.

Never taking another drink.

Excuse me? They'll do the things they need to do.

Rachel Denning (19:34.222)
I know guys who, because they had a temptation to look at inappropriate stuff on their phones, they absolutely refuse to have a smartphone. They won't. They won't do it. They refuse. And I love and honor that integrity. That, what Chet Holmes calls big headed discipline and determination. So actually I'm gonna encourage you and invite you to do some extreme things. To get a little intense. To get a little bit crazy.

because we want results at the end of the day, we want the results for an extraordinary life for our families. And so get clear about that. My friends get absolutely crystal clear about the thing you want and what you must do to get it. In fact, and share those, share that. You guys shoot me some messages, share those, share those with us, with me and, and let's, let's cheer each other on and go after this. Whoa. And, and again, I'm like,

We're kind of relaunching our extraordinary family life coaching monthly coaching program and get in that group, that community. It's a community, it's a tribe. We're supporting each other. We're going after it. And just month after month, we are just gonna hit this stuff and stay on top of the other, have tracking and accountability to get really crystal clear about the thing we want and the thing we must do in order to get what we want. So go after it, my friends. Remember, awesome is always an option.

and it comes down to the training. What's the training we're doing? Train, train for greatness, train for greatness, train for greatness. Do the thing you know you must do to get the thing you really want. And awesome is always an option. Reach upward.

Rachel Denning (21:23.118)
Hey everybody, thanks so much for listening to this episode. I hope you got a lot of value out of it and found some things that you can apply to your life right away. Hey, I'm being totally sincere when I say I live to help you live your extraordinary life. So I hope you'll reach out to me if you have any questions or let me know how I can help you in any important area of your life. And in fact, you know, this, this podcast is brought to you by the school of awesome sauce monthly coaching program. Take advantage of that. Get in there. If it's the,

best way to get a breakthrough to the next level so you can level up your health, your spirituality, your emotions, your mind, your relationships, your finances, business, every part of your life. Just get in there where you have a coach and a mentor, you have a supportive community to make things happen. So jump in there, take advantage of this, try it out, get in there with us and level up your life. See you on the inside. Reach upward.